Authentic connection is the heart of my practice. I develop meaningful, genuine relationships with each of my clients. Clients learn the skills to access their whole self and bring that whole self to relationships. Together, we discover and communicate our desires, needs, and boundaries.
Social justice values are central to my life and my practice. Systems of oppression have a profound effect on our body and nervous system; I integrate healing around homophobia, racism, misogyny, ableism, transphobia, and other systemic traumas into every component of my work. I am committed to working with clients of all genders, races, sexualities, abilities, and income levels. I offer sliding scale pricing to clients in my priority areas who have financial need (see ‘Fees’ below).
My practice is grounded in both science and spirituality. It is important to me that my clients gain a clear understanding of the psychological and medical foundations of the exercises we do, as well as come to a deeper awareness of self through embodiment and connection. Our sessions will integrate mindfulness techniques, somatic exercises, anatomical exploration, open communication, skills practice, and just having fun together!
I’m based in Western Massachusetts, land of the Nipmuc Nation, and am currently taking on clients in the northeast. If you’re looking for surrogate partner therapy and you’re located in Massachusetts, Vermont, New Hampshire, New York, Connecticut, Rhode Island, or other parts of New England, please contact me about working together.
Most clients choose to meet at my office in Northampton, Massachusetts, but on a case-by-case basis for clients who are able to cover the cost of my travel expenses, I may be open to traveling to the client’s home to meet.
I am not taking on clients in other parts of the country at this time. If you are looking for a surrogate partner in your area, you can find links to IPSA’s referrals services here.
I have received my vaccine and booster, and I get Covid tested weekly as part of my work schedule. I ask that my clients also be vaccinated and boosted, and that they receive a negative test (PCR or home antigen rapid test) before each of our in-person sessions.
As there are updates to the Covid situation, I will update this page and my protocols accordingly.
My standard rate is $250/hour. I typically recommend 1.5 hours for a Zoom session and two hours for an in-person session.
If you come from a background without access to wealth and are a person of color, queer, trans, gender nonconforming, nonbinary, intersex, and/or disabled, please contact me to be added to my waitlist for sliding scale spaces.
Surrogate Partner Therapy requires a triadic structure; the client, therapist, and surrogate work together continuously for the duration of the work. The client processes each of our sessions with their therapist, and the therapist and I check in regularly to ensure the client is supported. You can learn more about why you need a therapist in order to start working with me here.
If you are currently seeing a therapist and would like to work with me, contact me so we can discuss next steps. I am unable to work with clients who do not currently have a therapist.
If you have a therapist but aren’t sure if they’ll be on board to be part of the surrogate partner therapy triad, here’s a blog post I wrote with some tips on how to talk to your therapist about surrogate partner therapy.
If you are not currently seeing a therapist and want to work with me, here are some tips on finding a therapist:
- If you have health insurance, I recommend reaching out to your insurance company to find out their policy on therapy, which can save you a lot of money. If they offer coverage for mental health, ask them how you can find an in-network therapist, or do a search on PsychologyToday or Google for therapists who accept your insurance.
- Sex therapists and sex coaches tend to be more familiar with surrogate partner therapy than the average practitioner, so doing a search on PsychologyToday or Google for sex therapists or sex coaches in your area is a good direction to start in.
- Other types of therapists who I’ve found tend to be more open to collaborating on surrogate partner therapy include holistic therapists, somatic therapists, and therapists who use alternative medicines and approaches.
- PsychologyToday has a great search tool that allows you to find a therapist by location, insurance, issue, type of therapy, price, and gender. Just enter your city or zip code and use the toggle buttons at the top of the search results to choose the criteria you want to filter by. Make sure to read through a therapist’s profile to see if they’re accepting new clients at this time, as many therapists have full practices.
- I don’t typically recommend asking your therapist about surrogate partner therapy the first time you meet. For therapists who are unfamiliar with the work, it can raise red flags about a client’s intentions (e.g., “are they truly interested in doing self-work or are they just trying to have sex?”). I encourage clients to build a trusting relationship with their therapist before they broach this topic, which can take several weeks or even several months.
- One exception to this is if you have been in therapy in the past and are looking for a new therapist specifically to oversee your surrogate partner therapy journey. In this case, I do think it’s appropriate to bring up surrogate partner therapy in your first session. Tell your therapist about your therapy journey up to this point, what limitations you found with the therapy you received before, and why you think surrogate partner therapy is a good fit for you. Be open to answering your new therapist’s questions; check out this blog post if you need tips on talking with them. If a therapist tells you they’re not interested in collaborating on a surrogate partner therapy case, don’t push it; it’s best to find a therapist who is supportive of your goals.
- If a therapist has concerns that surrogate partner therapy is not the right fit for you, I always recommend hearing them out. Not all clients who think surrogate partner therapy is what they need are actually ready to take on this work. If a therapist tells you they don’t think surrogate partner therapy is the right fit for you, ask them what next steps they think would be supportive to your goals around intimacy, relationships, and sex.